Juniper Trees

So, this is the second half, and it comes from the same hike, but instead of talking about hiking, it's about a juniper tree that I saw. At the top of one of the peaks there is a level bit of ground that is about 100 yards long by about 20 yards across. It is almost completely surrounded by rocks and the soil is sand and rocks, that only grass seems to be able to get a good hold on. There is however, one juniper tree that has found it's home amond the rocky soil, and the roots snake in and out of the ground to get a firm grip on the edge of a dastardly fall. Looking at the tree I realized that it wasn't given the most ideal place to live, but God chose that tree to live in that place for some magical reason. Maybe specifically so I can draw some wisdom from it, maybe to leave a spot for a bird to sit as he's flying south. Either way, there is a tree, and it's healthy, about 10 feet tall. It could be very old, but I can't tell because there aren't a lot of other trees around. I got to thinking about it's ability to live, even though it wasn't given the best spot to live. We are all given places to live by God, we weren't randomly placed by some cosmic roulette wheel, God picked us. I have no idea what it is that I am supposed to do with my life, but I need to be like that tree and make the best life of it that I can in the place that I am. I'm not given another choice, I get the one pick, and after this, I have to answer to the man about how I chose to live the life that I was given. I don't get to ask for a second chance and I didn't pick this as my first choice over some list of other less desireable lives. Who then would be born to drug addicted parents, or even live in the suburbs. We would all be rich, but we would all have little need of God. I am happy with my life, I pick wrong sometimes, but for the most part, I have done well with the life God has given me.

Climbing Hills

The below post is actually an email that I sent to a friend of mine, it is in two parts and I'm going to post the second part as well, but you might, if you're reading this, have read the other part first, that is ok by me.

This is only a half of a coherent thought, and I"m in a rush, and I'm not sure why it hit me that I needed to send it now, but here goes. I've been hiking a lot since I took over this job. It's hard not to when I can walk out my front door, look left OR right and have 1000 ft climb just waiting for me. It's one of the advantages of being down in a hole, the view of the mountains is quite glorious. This week I've met a lot of great people and one of the questions that I ask almost anyone is if they like to hike around the hills or not. I was suprised to hear that many of them did not. It's a pretty enough view, but when I was up behind my house on about a 4000ft 'hill' I could see for miles. The view was spectacular. I felt a little sad for the people that never climb up there to take a look. It's like my own walk with Christ. I was comfortable just looking a Jesus and doing my own thing for so long that I missed out on what could be there if I started walking toward him. I get closer all the time, climb hills all the time, get to the top of the next ridge only to discover that further on there is a higher hill that is just out of reach. I know more and more about Jesus all the time, but there is always more to see. It won't be until I reach the end of life on this Earth that I will really get to see all there is to see. That is the pinnacle of this life, death. With death, we get to see God, Jesus, family, mother Teresa, whomever it is you desire to see, and they will love you. Some of this just spewed onto the page, but I think it worked out ok.

Arms out to God

Desperately people are seeking the attention of a father and from time to time you still will find one that fills the roll in a proper manner. Many children grow up today and miss out on the love and companionship of a father in their life. They don't know what is missing, only that something IS missing.

I remember being a young boy and standing on the edge of a pool. I was afraid to be in the water because I couldn't swim. I still don't swim well, but the difference is I know that I'm protected when I get into the water. When I was young, there was always mom or dad to keep you from drowning. Hurling yourself off the side of the pool was the way you played, often into water that was many times deep than your own head.

A few years ago, my oldest nephew was about 3 and my brother-in-law was crossing the street. Oblivious to his peril, he ran towards the road, we luckily caught up to him in time before he go into the street, but he ran, arms out seeking his father to lift him up.

In a life that is often times filled with pain and turmoil, we must remember that we can still jump from the side of the pool or run with arms reaching out into the arms of our father. God has a way of puting people into our path when we need them the most. It may not be God himself, but he is acting through the love of those that are closest to us to lift us up and to make us strong.

Remember that He is there, that He is waiting for us to come crying to him, and most important, He is waiting to lift us up.

Two Questions

Whose life are you meant to be in?
Who is meant to be in your life?

These were the two questions that were posed at worship tonight during Work and Worship weekend at Wildhorse Canyon. It is actually called Washington Family Ranch, but I just can't bring myself to calling it that. I haven't as of yet figured out the answer to the first question, but I have recently become involved in a ministry called Mark 2

(While he was preaching God's word to them, four men arrived carrying a paralyzed man on a mat. They couldn't bring him to Jesus because of the crowd, so they dug a hole through the roof above his head. Then they lowered the man on his mat, right down in front of Jesus. Mark 2-4).

2 is about helping those who can't really help themselves by giving them a ministry to be involved in. I work with two men who have disabilities of some kind and worked with another who is looking at coming to join. I don't know that I'm meant to be in their life, but I know that they are meant to be in mine. For just a day now I've worked with them and already found several places in my life that I need to work on. I'm sure that I will be assailed with more and more things that I need to work on, but I will work through these things that I have been informed of for now.

Ron Sauer, Jerry Tubbs, Steve Ericson, and I'm sure if I thought about it I could put down about 30 other names. At one time or another I have had people come into my life that have affected me in ways that helped me grow in Christ. These two guys are another couple guys. I wish I could say that I was meant to be in these guys lives, someday, I hope I find one person, one day who will say my name as an answer to that second question, in the mean time I will do what I can to learn rom those who were meant to be in my life.

Head sickness

I have almost made it back from Cambodia. I don't mean that I hit the exit hatch parachuted into the ocean and am now paddling my way back across the Pacific. I mean that my health, weight and some normality (thank you Douglas Adams) has returned. Then Why am I feeling the way that I do right now.

Cambodia was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I had both good and bad times, good memories, as well as some awful experiences that I wish I could forget. Put all together, the trip was something that was and is worth remembering. So now I'm home. I can't forget what happened to me, I can't even begin to explain it, but now I've just lost touch with this half of the world.

If you're wondering what I mean, then that makes two of us. I'm not sure I fully understand why I can't focus on the "what's next" in my life. This has the feel of running through a maze that has no exit, things start to look the same and then you're sure at one point that you've passed that place before.

Friends are still friends, my family is still on my last nerve most the time and I'm walking a tightrope with my finances, that much is the same, but my world has expanded once again and I don't know where I'm supposed to fit into it anymore. I literally have a head ache that won't go away.

Complete...

I got a bug! No, I'm not sick, well, actually I am sick, but nothing that I won't get over in a little time. This is a different kind of bug.

I'm told that when people start to get tattoos they just have a way of wanting to get more and more. Sure you can fight the urge and many people I know only have one that they got in the service years and years ago, but it seems that people with tattoos, want more of them.

I imagine that this is the way an addict feels when they get that itch in the back of their mind saying that they need to use again. Once they use, they don't feel it quite so badly. I'm coming off my high from my recent trip but am almost certain that in a month I'm going to want to travel somewhere else. My passport stamps look strangely alone in that this book.

Next trip, I don't know where it will take me. Maybe Israel, China, Australia, all would be equally amazing. I just have to listen carefully to where God is leading me. I'll go where he calls and be glad to do it. So my next adventure is out there, and I can already feel the itch starting. I need to go somewhere. Nevermind the hours in a plane or the week of sickness after. Those are a small price to pay to see the world in the hands of God.

Missions

I'm not sure what to expect of the next few weeks, but it will see me in 3 foreign countries and travelling over 14,000 miles. I'm not really excited about the trip in and of itself. I'm more excited about what it is God wants me to learn, see, do, while I'm in Cambodia.

A year ago now, Ted Albreicht spoke at my church and invited people to look into missions work for themselves. I began dialogue with some of the council because I felt like it was something that I was supposed to do. Moving ahead til now, I've raised the money and about have my stuff packed.

So, Why am I not excited? If anything I feel a bit fearful. Not for my own health, for the success of the trip, or for even my safety; I'm afraid of what it is that God has in store for me. Too much of my life I have sat and watched other people do things and this is really my first time that I've followed the prompting that I needed from the divine and went.

What will I see? What will happen? I'm not sure, but it is not an overwhelming fear, more like the kind you get when standing on a bridge about to jump into water from some great height. It's been done before by others and you aren't afraid of success, just how you will change as a result of the leap.

Here I go, I'm leaping.